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Men, it’s time to step up your sex game

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January 16, 2020 : With countless consumer products, ubiquitous porn, and popular expectations of men ‘performing’ tirelessly in the bedroom, it’s natural that desires and pleasure can take the backseat.

As greatness in sex is intuitively linked with being ‘manly’, a sexual act that could be pleasurable for both partners, can be reduced to the idea of brazen performance.

To be at peace and to express yourself freely, men must accept their sexuality. This acceptance must be built in terms of what feels right and what makes you happy, and not by following what others or society expects out of you. Just like no two individuals are alike, what counts as ‘great sex’ is different for each individual and couple.

For Gaurav Gupta, the co-founder of men’s health and wellness brand Misters.in, sex is the sine qua non of a life well lived.

“Dear men, to start with, keep it in mind that sex is a collective feeling of partners and is not solely a man’s bastion. The act of lovemaking is a very private affair and should concern the partners involved. If both are happy and content, nothing can be better or greater,” he opines.

Top five tips for men to have better sex.

1. Foreplay

Foreplay is the sweetest part of lovemaking. It is foreplay that makes the human sexual experience different from animals. The sweet nothings, cuddling, kisses and hugs make couples bond more deeply than through intercourse. Especially for women, foreplay holds a very special position in the entire lovemaking process and they tend to remember it more vividly than anything else about sex. Prolonged foreplay also vastly enhances the sexual experience for both partners.

2. Understand your partner’s needs

Knowing what your partner wants in bed is the most powerful tool for better sex. Sadly, in their zeal for self-gratification, most men tend to ignore this. What they miss out on is a spontaneous partner going on the way to make the experience more mutually gratifying while building a greater trust factor which in turn strengthens the relationship. To make sex better, try and find out what turns your partner on – Is it oral? Visual? Mental? According to experts, more than the intercourse itself, women find greater pleasure in oral stimulation; so go ahead and pleasure her. Don’t forget to stimulate the clitoris too.

3. Self-education

Educate yourself. Learn about the basic rules of sex, about what women like in bed, about lubricants, about making love differently, about pleasuring each other in newer ways, about how hormone levels and sexual drive change with age, and much more. If you are experiencing any sexual health issue, seek help. It is essential to educate yourself to destroy the expectation of hyper-masculinity, the idea of which is built on the wrong notion of objectifying men and unknowingly putting them in the performance arena. Pornography can triggers feelings of low self-esteem among men, while in reality, porn is not about average men and is the farthest end of the spectrum.

4. Try something new

In long term relationships, sex often tends to be tedious and it becomes increasingly tricky to get excited, stay focused, and pleasure your partner. Experimentation is what you need. Think of making love to your partner outside the hackneyed bedroom. Explore newer corners of your home. What about the kitchen countertop? Be experimental in bed – try new positions, stop shying away from sex toys, and consider using vibrators made for couples. Moreover, talk about sexual fantasies, new lubricants, and new ways of pleasuring each other, to make sex not only better but more thrilling.

5. Communication

Ask her how she feels, if she wants something different and tell her how desirable she is – and see how she unravels herself. Talking openly always makes sexual experiences better. In case you had an issue with your partner regarding sex, something that has created tension or resentment – gently broach the subject with her and clear the cloud.

In the case of sexual disorders, be it erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation, effective communication with the partner is extremely critical. Ideas floated in the name of great sex are mostly hyperbolic. In life, great sex mostly comes from great love.

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India

Stressed over board exams? Spend 10 mins daily with nature

They found that 10-50 minutes in natural spaces was the most effective to improve mood, focus and physiological markers like blood pressure and heart rate.

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New York, Feb 26 : Amid the ongoing board exams, spending as little as 10 minutes in a natural setting like the neighbourhood park can help students feel happier and lessen the effects of both physical and mental stress, say researchers.

The team from Cornell University in the US found that 10-50 minutes in natural spaces was the most effective to improve mood, focus and physiological markers like blood pressure and heart rate.

The study, published in the journal Frontiers in Psychology, aims to provide an easily-achievable dosage that physicians can prescribe as a preventive measure against high levels of stress, anxiety, depression and other mental health issues college students face.

“It doesn’t take much time for the positive benefits to kick in — we’re talking 10 minutes outside in a space with nature,” said study lead author Gen Meredith from the Cornell University.

“We firmly believe that every student, no matter what subject or how high their workload, has that much discretionary time each day, or at least a few times per week,” Meredith added.

For the findings, the research team reviewed studies that examined the effects of nature on people of college age (no younger than 15, no older than 30) to discover how much time students should be spending outside and what they should be doing while they’re there.

They found that 10-50 minutes in natural spaces was the most effective to improve mood, focus and physiological markers like blood pressure and heart rate.

“It’s not that there’s a decline after 50 minutes, but rather that the physiological and self-reported psychological benefits tend to plateau after that,” said study co-author Donald Rakow.

To enjoy the positive effects of being outside, students need only to be sitting or walking, the two primary activities the researchers examined in an effort to provide accessible recommendations.

“This is an opportunity to challenge our thinking around what nature can be. It is really all around us: trees, a planter with flowers, a grassy quad or a wooded area,” Meredith said.

The impetus for this work is a movement toward prescribing time in nature as a way to prevent or improve stress and anxiety, while also supporting physical and mental health outcomes.

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Foreigners feel ‘blessed’ to see Taj the day Trump visited

At many places on the route, the administration had made several statues of animals with flowers.

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Foreigners at Agra

Agra, Feb 24 : The foreign tourists who arrived in this historic city on Monday to see Taj Mahal said they were “lucky” and “felt blessed” to visit the 17th century monument on the day of US President Donald Trump’s visit.

The US President, who earlier in the day arrived at Ahmedabad and was received by Prime Minister Narendra Modi, also announced a $3 billion chopper deal.

He landed here around 4.20 p.m. He was received by Governor Anandiben Patel and Chief Minister Yogi Adityanath at the Kheria airport.

Keith Clarke, a tourist from England, told IANS, “It’s my first visit to Agra, and India.” After reaching New Delhi three days ago, he arrived at Agra on Sunday night. When asked if he saw Taj Mahal, Clarke said, “Of course, I visited Taj in the morning before the US President’s arrival.”

Another foreign tourists, Sua Clarke said she was amazed as the US President was coming the same day to see Taj Mahal. Sua, in her late 50’s, said it was her first visit to India and was stunned by the cleanliness of the city.

On folk artists’ performance in the city, she said, “We loved the performance. And they too were enjoying while performing.” Artists’ performance was part of programme to welcome the First US Couple.

Alan, who also arrived here from the UK, said it was a lovely experience to find the Taj Mahal cleaned properly. “I heard that the Taj’s mausoleum were cleaned and the fresh mud wrapping were put on the graves of emperor (Shahjahan) and empress (Mumtaz),” he said.

Catherine Caley, also among the group, said her first visit to India had become memorable. “My trip to Agra and the Taj is one of the best moments of my life as before getting married I saw the monument on the day when the US President visited the historic site on same day along with his family.”

To welcome the US First Family here, the city was given a massive facelift. The administration put up huge billboards, placards, cut-outs and posters welcoming Trump and Melania.

The 13-km route from the airport to Taj Mahal had been spruced up aesthetically. The Indian and the US flags had been put up at round-abouts to give the area a festive look.

At many places on the route, the administration had made several statues of animals with flowers.

The walls were adorned with paintings reflecting the Brij culture and architectural heritage of Agra, Victorian-style lamp posts installed and the lawns of the Taj bedecked with colourful blooms.

(Anand Singh can be contacted at [email protected])

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Lifestyle

‘Minorities have complete freedom in Pakistan’

According to the London-based Minority Rights Group International, ethnic minorities in Pakistan include Sindhis (14.1 per cent), Pashtuns (15.42 per cent), Mohajirs (7.57 per cent), Baluchis (3.57 per cent).

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PESHAWAR

Karachi, Feb 24 : Members of minority groups in Pakistan can practice their religion openly and move about with complete freedom in the Muslim-majority country, a Minister has clamed.

While visiting the Swami Narayan Temple in Karachi on Sunday, provincial minister Nasir Hussain Shah vowed to protect the rights of minorities, reports The Express Tribune.

He commended the role and contribution that minorities have played in the development and progress of Pakistan, adding that he had come to the temple with a message of peace.

On behalf of the government, he also announced that 10,000 copies of the Bhagavad Gita would soon be distributed.

According to the London-based Minority Rights Group International, ethnic minorities in Pakistan include Sindhis (14.1 per cent), Pashtuns (15.42 per cent), Mohajirs (7.57 per cent), Baluchis (3.57 per cent).

Religious minorities include Christians (1.59 per cent), Ahmadis (0.22 per cent), Hindus (1.6 per cent), Shias, Isma’ilis, Bohras, Parsis and Sikhs.

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